Days that are gone

tmaclliu · 发表于 2015-5-17 23:49

Days, sunny or rainy, have been gloomy for me  for a long time for I do not know what reason, even the prospect of being a graduate student of one of my favorite universities can not ease it even a little. And it has reached its bottom after last night's unhappy things that occured between me and a girl to whom I hold a slight of affection, and from whom I recieved a warm feeling now and then.

When I saw my name was among the list of students enrolled by my target university, the glee was not so strong as it was supposed to be. Then I knew something must be wrong, but no answer has no been found yet so far after I tried to do so. Nothing, going to the Karaoke, going to the cinema, having a travel and what not,  can change that depressed feeling.

However, just now, a click into the QQ zone of an old friend has created a big stir in my heart----my eyes get wet after this virtual calling on my friend.

I go  directly to the messages  left to his zone by his friends. The last three are made by a girl, who was once also on my friend list and whom I, being bored by the constant commercial ads put out from her zone, deleted without a hesitation. She is married and has a happy family now. This I Knew before the defriending. To be honest, right since the momment she began to market her product online through such private social software such as QQ, I was really fed up and, as a result, deemed her as one like greed-filled and heart-deprived bussinessmen. That entirelly goes opposite to her image in my mind at the very beggining.

I met her when I was a freshman and she a sophomore through the chance when she and his boyfriend Xing, the man I was speaking, made a holliday reunion in our school, she and him being at diffrent schools. He was our roommate and opportunities were available for us hanging out together. The first view of her was impressive. Slim, sweet smile, grace and elegant, curls hanging swelling on her shoulder, a trace of aroma as she passed by enhancing all the qualities above. What is more suprising, she is head and shoulder taller than her sweetie. To compensate that or to reduce the natural unmatchedness she never wore a high heel when appearing with him in the public. As is generally heard, beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, and height is not mighty enough to stop the passion of love any more than a dam is firm enough to hold the frocious flood. They became one as soon as they were together, gentle glances were never failed to be behold in their eyes as they looked at each other, the two corners of their mouth were always set apart the furthest, and they were never more than half a metre away even in the deep summer, as if it was them that have aroused the scorching heat of that season. When they were at their seperate own school, every night the last human word must be issued from under the quilt of him who had been whispering to his darling for no less than two hours. Unruly as he was, he would motionlessly be seated and attentively write down the messages sent by his love letter by letter on the paper.

The passing of three and half years  brought us to the end of our college life and expanded their relationship to almost seven years(three in high school). Then devastating news came. He had to call a halt to his study and go back home for body-recovering as serious faults were found in his kidney. So sad did we felt when the message was delivered to our ears. But, appearing as composed as usual, he pacified us with normal voice. Hugs were exchanged and he left with all of us expecting to see him again in a possible future. It never happens as yet as I am typing these words.

SHE was extremly worried about him, aggitated and sad. There was never a chance afterwards that she called us without sobbing. The return of his coming back was postponed again and once again until all graduated and left the school that was waiting for him to return.

Strong opposition came as expected from her family to meet him again. Consider the fact that their connection was strongly supported before by parents from both sides and that they had been in deep love for such a long time, nothing is parallel in sadness to the result that she relinguished his hands at last.

It is quite justified that we are not justified to fling words of judgement upon her decision and the consequence. Every worldy person has the warrant to select his own life and the life must be a kind  of hope and future. And speaking of love, needless to say, breaking up is as hard a thing as rending the heart. But one thing is for certain, love fades in propotion to the growing age and only trace exist as part of memory.

Now let us back on the subject, about her, I saw her get married, to a bussinessman, saw her have a child,very cute---------nothing seems to worry  about.

But, I don't think so, for I also saw, in his qq zone, a line that reads: Dear, wish you good health. And that QQ account of him he stopped using it for years and the line is new.